This Is Our Concern Dude

There it is Bears fans. Jay Cutler in a Bears jersey. Was it worth it? They gave up two first rounders and a third rounder for him. Oh yeah, they also gave up The Neckbeard, but that's a non-issue since you got Cutler. I have to admit I am a bit stunned that the Bears actually pulled the trigger on this deal. They are pretty notoriously cheap. Bears fans seem to be approving of the deal in general, but I see a few things inevitably happening. 1. One of those draft picks will comeback to haunt you. This always happens to you lowly Cubs and Bears fans. You trade away a draft pick and then that pick turns out to be an All-Star for the team who picked him. The other side of this coin is that with the Bears, they are generally terrible in the draft, and could have probably drafted the same player and made him a bust. (CoughRashanSalaamCurtisEnisCough) 2. You make Jay Cutler cry into his insulin and demand another trade. Hey, It's already happened once. 3.Even though you have a Pro B...

Well, That figures. As soon as I go and write a lengthy WBC preview and dedicate a whole section to blasting Roidy McRoidpants here, it comes out that he has a cyst on his hip. Now he needs to see a specialist, and probably won't even play for the Dominican team. Thanks for making me look stupid and wasting my time. I hope that cyst is from all the times your cousin stuck a syringe in your ass and juiced you up, fucker.

Like many other fine, upstanding American citizens, I am pretty jacked about the upcoming baseball season. I know my beloved Chicago White Sox most likely aren't going to the playoffs, but I think they will be at least competitive, and I have a bevy of other things to look forward too. I have my fantasy league for the year all lined up, I get to watch the Cubs fail yet again, and I will look forward to hearing Hawk Harrelson yelp "YOU CAN PUT IT ON THE BOOOOOAAAARD......YES!" the first time a southsider hits a homer. If I hadn't told you already that I was going to talk about the WBC, you probably wouldn't be thinking I'd left something out. The problem is, that even the average baseball fan doesn't really have that much interest in the Classic. This blows my mind. This is like average soccer fans not having any interest in the World Cup. I do, however, realize that this is only the second World Baseball Classic, and that the whole process is still in its ...

This guy needs to get on some type of program... Weight Watchers or somethin...

I've probably never missed the boat on anything more than I missed the boat on the Album "808's and Heartbreak" by Kanye West. I always liked the song "Heartless" off of this album, but I finally downloaded it. All I can say is that this is a must have. The song "Robocop" is probably one of the all-around best songs I have heard recently. I admit, I have always been the first to rip Kanye as a rapper, but alternately praise him as a producer. This album showcases his talents as an artist as he isn't rapping, but singing (even if he uses autotune). I don't care if you are a Kanye fan, or if you listen to hip-hop, this is an album that's a must own no matter what you listen to. I promise that you will be able to relate.

I will admit, my interest in the NBA is passing at best most of the time. The Chicago Bulls kinda suck, and I actually find myself rooting for individual players more than my own favorite team. LeBron James, Dwight Howard, Deron Williams, Derrick Rose (who is the only reason the Bulls are worth watcing) and Kevin Durant come to mind (among others), but as a sports fan I can't resist a good trade deadline. I especially can't resist one where my favorite team made a couple moves that actually make sense to me. So here is my take on some of the more notable trades. 1. The Bulls get Brad Miller and John Salmons; The Kings get Andres Nocioni and Drew Gooden . I like this move because it actually gives the Bulls someone who can score in the paint. Everyone they have who plays the 4 or 5 for the Bulls is super-athletic with a low basketball IQ and disturbing lack of post moves or a jumper (Lookin at you Jo Noah and Ty Thomas). Brad Miller gives them a solid (but old) option at the 5, ...

This is the screenshot of the most epic NBA Jam beatdown I have ever personally witnessed. I played "Thunder" Dan Majerle for all 4 quarters and literally took every shot with him en route to a 96-31 dirtnap for my friend Matt. Pictures were taken just to prove this actually happened. I was leading 49-9 at half, and I spent the second half trying to reach 100 pts with "Thunder" Dan. Matt may or may not have cried afterwards. Ok, he didn't cry, but he should have. That's fucking embarrassing.

Saw some old video of Tim Legler the other night... Couldn't help it. (Conjures up a Simple Jack impression) His hair makes my eyes rain...

This emerald colored sprite is your 2009 Slam Dunk Champ. This doesn't bother me because of the dunks Nate Robinson did. His dunk where he jumped over Dwight Howard in the finals was downright epic, even if he needed to push off Dwight's shoulder and still rubbed his junk on Dwight's head. He's like 5'8 and jumped over a 7 footer...and then he dunked a basketball. I'm 6ft tall and I can barely touch rim with no one in my way. I also admit that the green jersey to make him Kypto-Nate to Dwight Howard's "Superman" was a nice touch. The thing is... Dwight Howard should have won, but he did his dunks in the wrong order. For his 2nd dunk in the first round, he brought out a 12 foot hoop, ducked into a phone booth, came out in his Superman cape, and threw in a Jameer Nelson pass off the backboard with ease. Between the theatrics and the actual dunk, this was my favorite dunk of the night. He got a 50 on the dunk, which is a perfect score for those uned...

Well here we go again, that insufferable prick, Brett Favre, has retired for the second consecutive year. The question is, is this for real? Or is this like those damn Halloween movies where everyone always thinks they've killed Michael Myers, but then he comes back from being shot 6 times or incinerated or getting his head chopped off to keep giving Jamie Lee Curtis shit? Because I'm pretty sure that people have thought we were done with him every year since 2003 or so, and the last two times he actually did retire. I've never been a Favre fan, but I used to hate him for completely different reasons. He used to be the QB for a team that was a legit threat to my Dallas Cowboys back in the 90's. I remember being scared shitless of him and Dorsey Levens in the 95 NFC championship. It's just too bad that Mr. Perfect here couldn't win in Texas Stadium. Now, I just hate him for being a waffling-doucher-drama queen who throws interceptions like it's his job. Worst...

Well, It happened... blink-182 reunited. When they got on stage together...Travis Barker leaned to the microphone and nonchalantly said "we used to play music together, and we decided we're going to play music together again." Mark Hoppus followed in step by stating "blink-182 is back!" The thing is the crowd at the Grammys didn't seem to care. I could care less about them though. Blink already has a new website set up, and have provided another statement via the website. "Hi. We're blink-182. This past week there've been a lot of questions about the current status of the band, and we wanted you to hear it straight from us. To put it simply, we're back. We mean, really back. Picking up where we left off and then some. In the studio writing and recording a new album. Preparing to tour the world yet again. Friendships reformed. 17 years deep in our legacy. Summer 2009 Thanks and get ready." Fuck and Yes. I assure you, I will be more than ...

I just peed myself . I just read that Blink-182 will be presenting at the Grammys. For those not in the know, this is a big fucking deal because of the fact that they haven't appeared together since 2004. After that, they went on "indefinite hiatus", and Mark and Tom stopped talking to each other as they created separate bands that didn't come close to measuring up to Blink. Back during Blink's heyday I was one of the bigger Blink-182 fans you could find. I had an entire wall in my room plastered with Blink posters and pictures (No Homo). I have all of their CD's. Yes, actual hard copy CD's. I mean, they are in my old room at my parents house somewhere, but god damn it, I have them... somewhere. This is basically me wishing for a reunion tour. I've seen almost all of my other favorite bands live now (at least the ones without dead members, and are within the realm of possibly seeing). AC/DC, Weezer, Dashboard Confessional, The Foo Fighters, Green Day, ...

Now, I don't like being that asshole, but here it goes... I FUCKING TOLD YOU SO. I have a very select number of friends who enjoy soccer, (It's because I live in America.) and these few lost souls really thought that David Beckham would make a difference in the American level of interest in soccer. I even heard some of the sportswriters that are allowed to yell on ESPN on a daily basis lauding Beckham as the second coming of Pele playing in America. (Remeber though, Pele only helped soccer out for a handful of years, then we went right back to not caring.) Well, all of these people were wrong. We still don't care about soccer as a nation, and Becks wants to head back over to Italy to play for AC Milan. He's tired of playing in what amounts to a minor league as far as soccer goes around the world. Let's face it, great players play in the EPL, Bundesliga, and the other leagues around Europe. I say just let Beckham go. He deserves to go play with people who are on his ...

Seriously. I have never had any inkling of being religious, and after the Super Bowl Sunday night... I can't see why Kurt Warner will go back to church next Sunday. I sat waiting for a review on Mr. Warner's "fumble" with :05 left on the clock. It never came. Al Michaels tried to feed me some horseshit about how the officials confirmed the call on the field as the Steelers rushed on the field, kneeled on the ball and killed any dreams I had of trying to watch Kurt Warner lob a mircale at Larry Fitzgerald with zeroes on the game clock. So I say to you Kurt Warner... Where was your God when you "Fumbled"? You, Ken Whisenhunt, and I all know that was an incomplete pass. We all know that your team got jobbed by the refs on multiple occaisions, but the least that the Big Guy could've done for you is get a review on the play. Sorry, Kurt. You've been forsaken. It's probably because you went back on that whole "Hey kids, you get a new puppy if I ma...

If tonight's game was an epic showdown of a back-up QB's ability to administer a beer bong. The line would look something like this. Matt Leinart (-21) vs. Byron Leftwich Unfortunately this isn't the case, and their is actually a football game to be played. Now, I will be rooting for The Buzzsaw That Is The Arizona Cardinals, and there are a few reasons. 1. Obviously, when your favorite team isn't involved and you don't have a major grudge against either team, you adopt the underdog. Adopting the favorite makes you boring and a doucher. 2. The Steelers have won 5 Super Bowls already. I don't want them to have 6. The reason for this is that I am a Dallas Cowboys fan, and my favorite dysfunctional family has also won 5 Super Bowls. I don't want the Steelers to break the menage-a-tie they have going with the Boys and 49ers for most Super Bowl wins of all time. It's not a big deal, but hey, not unlike the Globo Gym Purple Cobras...the Cowboys are better than...

This is so fucking stupid. No, I'm not talking about the fact that Michael Phelps smokes weed. At this point I can't really condemn the kid for occasionally getting ripped out of season. The part of this that's retarded is the fact that this was treated as front page news. So the fuck what? Find me a 23 year old kid who attended school at a major university (or any 23 year old for that matter) who was never smoked weed once in his life and I will show you the fucking minority. Chances are that Phelps was just partying somewhere, was already a bit drunk and said "Fuck it, Let's Party." I would wager that Michael Phelps doesn't smoke all that often. When would he? He trains his ass off for about 10 months out of the year. It takes that much work to be the swimmer in the world. Conversely, since he is training relentlessly as much as he is, should't we let him cut loose every once in a while? It's not like he was caught shooting heroin into his arm or...

Seriously, Mike Tomlin is without peer the coolest motherfucker holding a head coach position in the NFL right now. Look at him, and then look over at Ken Whisenhunt. The Whiz looks like he's going to a damn job interview, while Tomlin looks like he should be walking in slow motion next to Will Smith as Martin Lawrence's replacement in Bad Boys 3. All I'm saying is that I'm rooting for Whisenhunt and the Buzzsaw...but God damn I'd rather have Tomlin coaching my team...