While Peter King Gently Weeps....

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Well here we go again, that insufferable prick, Brett Favre, has retired for the second consecutive year.

The question is, is this for real? Or is this like those damn Halloween movies where everyone always thinks they've killed Michael Myers, but then he comes back from being shot 6 times or incinerated or getting his head chopped off to keep giving Jamie Lee Curtis shit? Because I'm pretty sure that people have thought we were done with him every year since 2003 or so, and the last two times he actually did retire.

I've never been a Favre fan, but I used to hate him for completely different reasons. He used to be the QB for a team that was a legit threat to my Dallas Cowboys back in the 90's. I remember being scared shitless of him and Dorsey Levens in the 95 NFC championship. It's just too bad that Mr. Perfect here couldn't win in Texas Stadium.

Now, I just hate him for being a waffling-doucher-drama queen who throws interceptions like it's his job. Worst of all though is the way that the media fawns over this motherfucker for doing things the right way. Is holding the Green Bay Packers hostage every offseason doing in the right way? In a word no.

Seriously, I respected the addicted to painkillers/ 3-time MVP Favre way more that the insufferable prick he turned into.

I guess what I'm really trying to say is that John Madden and Peter King are the only guys who are going to miss you, and John Madden already has a developing crush on Tony Romo, so Peter King will soon be the sole person willing to fly down to Hattiesburg, MS to slob your knob.

Please. Stay Retired. Do whatever you want... Hunt... Fish... Film some more Wrangler commercials where you throw like a girl, but fuck my ass, please don't ever play football again.

See you at your Hall of Fame Induction, Douche.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Thunder Dan really? That is the best name you came up with? A retired Sun/Heat with spiked hair and a chain of steakhouses. Was Oliver Miller's boobs already taken as a name? Burnin Vernon would have at least given the allusion of an STD and then you know your readers (or maybe reader) would have known you have gotten laid once. Just messin, keep up the good work.

Dude abides
February 11, 2009 at 11:53 PM
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